Understanding Gaming & Your Child’s Well-Being

Gaming isn’t just screen time—it’s play, creativity, connection, and sometimes competition.
But it can also come with challenges: time management, in-game spending, and exposure to strangers or inappropriate content.

Below, you’ll find resources on:

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Gaming 101

A Note on Game Types

Not all games are the same, and how they’re delivered matters:

  • Cartridge / Downloaded Games: These are self-contained. Kids can pause and stop more easily because there’s no pressure from other players or live events to stay online. They’re usually a better fit for younger children or families just starting with gaming.

    • Examples: Mario Kart, Minecraft (offline mode), Animal Crossing (cartridge version).

  • Server-Based / Online Games: These connect to the internet and often involve other players. Because they run on live servers with ongoing events, kids may feel pressure to keep playing so they don’t let down teammates, miss rewards, or fall behind. These games also carry added risks, like exposure to strangers, in-game purchases, and competitive pressure.

    • Examples: Fortnite, Roblox, Minecraft Realms/online servers.

  • Legal & Safety Note: Some popular online games, like Roblox, have faced lawsuits and scrutiny for not doing enough to protect young players from inappropriate content, unsafe interactions, and risky design features. This highlights the importance of:

    • Reviewing chat and friend settings

    • Turning on content filters and parental controls

    • Being cautious with games that allow unsupervised interaction with strangers

    • Talking regularly with your child about who they’re playing with and how the game makes them feel

A young boy holding a gaming controller and focused on a screen, with a blurred background.

Gaming Stepping Stones

Not all games are created equal—and not all kids are ready for the same types of play. Think of gaming as a progression: Early experiences should be age-appropriate, easy to pause, and rich in creativity.

Start with simple, safe platforms

Young kids benefit from games that encourage exploration and learning. Some solid early choices include:

These games help kids practice taking turns, handling frustration, and knowing when to stop—key readiness skills for more advanced gaming.

Hold off on multiplayer or chat-enabled games until your child can:

  • Handle digital conflict without getting overwhelmed

  • Take breaks independently

  • Understand privacy and stranger danger

A woman and a young boy sitting on the floor in front of a laptop, looking at the screen together with smiles, in a cozy living room.

When to Introduce Gaming

Every child is different, but here’s a general framework:

All Ages

  • Where does the game live? In your child’s bedroom where it can be accessed after bedtime, or in a common area of the home?

  • Will you allow your child to use headphones, or would you prefer they can still hear you while playing?

Elementary School

  • Prioritize games with limited or no social features.

  • Begin discussing money, ads, and basic online safety.

Middle School

  • Some kids may be ready for online play—with close supervision.

  • Review chat settings and set rules about who they can play with.

  • Talk about how to balance gaming with school, activities, and friendships.

High School

  • Support your teen in self-monitoring and taking ownership of their gaming habits.

  • Keep conversations going about safety, spending, and emotional health.

  • Acknowledge gaming as a social outlet while still setting family expectations.

A man and a girl sitting on a couch, playing video games together with controllers, smiling and enjoying their time.

Insight

85% of U.S. teens report playing video games, and 41% say they play them at least once a day. Four-in-ten identify as a gamer. (Pew Research Center, 2024)

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Timing Guidance

Gaming is part of your child’s entertainment screen time and should be considered in the overall context of screen use. See our Screen Time Section for more detail on benchmarks and healthy use.

Some key things to keep in mind:

  • Make sure gaming doesn’t crowd out sleep, schoolwork, physical activity, or relationships.

  • Encourage breaks rather than long, continuous sessions.

  • Benchmarks: If your child is spending significantly more time gaming than the entertainment screen time limits often suggested by pediatricians and other experts (see [Screen Time guidance] – hyperlink), reflect on whether it’s affecting sleep, schoolwork, activity, or connections — and consider reducing if so.

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Building Skills

Online Safety in Gaming

Games with chat features or multiplayer modes expose kids to strangers. Even seemingly “kid-friendly” games can include harmful content or behavior.

It’s also important to understand the difference between server-based games (like Roblox or Minecraft) that run on online networks and often connect kids to large groups of strangers, and non-online games (like Zelda or Mario Kart) that don’t require the internet. Both types can be challenging: server-based games raise safety concerns, while non-online games can still make it hard for kids to stop playing.

Help your child:

  • Use strong usernames that protect their identity

  • Stick to playing with friends or people they know

  • Report or block anyone who makes them uncomfortable

  • Understand that “disappearing messages” or voice chats still carry risk

  • Use platform-specific parental controls to manage who they can interact with

Insight

80% of all teens think harassment over video games is a problem for people their age. And 41% of those who play them say they’ve been called an offensive name when playing. (Pew Research Center, 2024)

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Healthy Gaming Habits

Treat it like any other hobby
 Encourage your child to enjoy gaming as part of a well-rounded day—not the main event. Make time for movement, offline play, meals, and rest.

Talk about game content
 Know what they’re playing and why they like it. Use game ratings (ESRB) to guide decisions. Ratings are displayed both on the game’s packaging and in the description when downloading. These can help you quickly see if a game is age-appropriate.

When evaluating a game, consider:

  • Who are they playing with? Is it limited to friends, or can anyone on the internet join?

  • Is it a closed system (only people physically present), or can online friends connect with a code?

  • Is the gameplay cooperative, competitive, or both?

  • Does the game include violent, sexual, or commercial elements?

  • Is the design meant for short, casual sessions—or to keep kids online for long stretches>

  • Does it include microtransactions (in-app purchases for upgrades, skins, or faster progress)?

Watch for emotional impact
 Some games energize and inspire kids. Others leave them frustrated, upset, or zoned out. Help your child notice the difference and check in regularly about how games make them feel.

Insight

12% of adolescents are at risk of problematic gaming, which is defined by the World Health Organization as patterns of play that interfere with daily life—such as neglecting school, sleep, meals, or friendships. Boys are more likely than girls to show signs (16% vs 7%). (WHO, 2024)

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Setting Limits That Stick

Focus on balance, not hours

A strict timing rule may not fit every child—or every game. Look at what they’re playing, when, and how it’s affecting their life.

Use natural stopping points

It’s hard to pause mid-battle or right before saving. Set limits around in-game events:

  • "One more round"

  • "Play until you reach your next checkpoint"

Establish tech-free times and zones

Meals, bedtime, and schoolwork should be free of gaming and devices. Keep consoles and computers in shared spaces when possible.

Make space for real-life connection

Encourage time with family and friends in person. Games should complement relationships—not replace them.

A young woman with braided hair sitting in a chair, holding a video game controller, in a room with a white wall and a colorful artwork on the wall.

In-Game Spending and Microtransactions

Many games now include opportunities to spend real money on cosmetic upgrades, in-game currency, or faster progress.

Help your child:

  • Understand the value of money in a digital context

  • Recognize pressure from friends or influencers to buy things

  • Set spending limits or require permission before purchases

  • Talk to your kids about the fear of missing out that’s created through monetary barriers – the industry thrives on this for microtransactions

Tip: Turn off in-app purchases or use parental controls to prevent surprises.

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Insight

A third (34%) of adolescents played digital games daily, with more than 1 in 5 (22%) playing for at least 4 hours on days when they engage in gaming. (WHO, 2024)

Laptop screen displaying the Minecraft website, with a colorful Minecraft landscape in the background and a prominent green 'Get Minecraft' button.

Supporting Your Child’s Gaming Interests

Get curious, not critical
 Ask your child to show you their favorite game. Let them explain the rules, characters, and what they enjoy about it. It builds trust—and helps you understand their world.

Connect gaming to other areas

  • Love Minecraft? Try coding or digital art tools.

  • Into racing games? Explore real-life car mechanics or engineering.

  • Enjoy narrative games? Encourage reading or storytelling.

  • Into strategy/war games? Try chess or other board games, too.

Join in when you can
 Play together, even briefly. You’ll see how they interact with others, and they’ll feel seen and understood.

Insight

About 9 in 10 teen video game players (89%) say they play them with other people, in person or online. Far fewer (11%) play them only on their own. (Pew Research Center, 2024)

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When Gaming Becomes a Problem

Watch for red flags:

  • Loss of interest in everything except gaming

  • Strong resistance or aggression when asked to stop

  • Trouble sleeping, eating, or staying focused

  • Gaming interfering with school, family time, or friendships

If you're noticing persistent issues, consider:

  • Reassessing routines and boundaries

  • Talking to a school counselor or pediatrician

  • Exploring whether gaming is being used to avoid stress, anxiety, or other challenges

Insight

For children playing approximately 8 hours or more per week, frequent competitive gaming may be a risk factor for decreasing prosocial behavior. (Video Gaming and Children's Psychosocial Wellbeing: A Longitudinal Study, 2017)

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It’s Not Too Late

Maybe your child is already deep into gaming—and you’re realizing the habits, content, or time spent aren’t what you hoped. The good news: It’s never too late to reset routines, tighten safety, or create new boundaries. Changes can happen at any stage, and your involvement still makes a big difference.

Why It’s Not Too Late:

  • Kids are adaptable—most will adjust to new limits and expectations faster than you think.

  • You can still set clear rules around time, spending, and content, even after gaming is part of daily life.

Late changes can be framed as helping your child stay healthy, balanced, and safe—not as punishment.

A young girl sitting on the floor in a room, looking intently at her handheld device, with sunlight streaming through a window behind her.

How to Reset Gaming Habits:

  1. Have a “Pause and Plan” Conversation

    • Acknowledge what’s working and what’s not.

    • Involve your child in setting new rules so they feel ownership, not just restriction.

  2. Revisit Game Choices

    • Swap out high-stress or high-spending games for titles with more creativity, cooperation, or shorter play sessions.

    • Consider “cooling-off” periods from multiplayer games if drama or conflict is a problem.

  3. Reframe Time Limits

    • Instead of just cutting hours, set when gaming can happen (after homework, not before bed) and tie it to other activities.

    • Use natural stopping points—like the end of a match or a save point—rather than the clock alone.

  4. Reset Safety Settings

    • Review chat filters, friend lists, and privacy settings together.

    • Remove in-game purchase options if spending has gotten out of hand.

  5. Model Healthy Play

    • Let your child see you enjoying balanced leisure time—reading, walking, hobbies—not just scrolling or gaming yourself.

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Helpful Tools

Gaming Readiness Checklist

Use this list to assess whether your child is developing healthy gaming habits.

Emotional and Social Skills

  • Can stop playing without meltdowns or extreme frustration

  • Handles losing or conflict in games appropriately

  • Balances gaming with offline friendships and activities

  • Talks openly about who they play with and what happens in the game

Time and Task Management

  • Sticks to agreed-upon time limits or routines

  • Completes schoolwork and responsibilities before playing

  • Takes breaks without reminders or arguments

  • Doesn’t sacrifice sleep or meals for gaming

Safety and Spending Awareness

  • Uses a username that protects personal information

  • Knows how to block/report inappropriate players

  • Asks before making in-game purchases

  • Understands the difference between real and virtual money

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Printable Checklist

Download the PDF version below to print it out and review with your family!